Thursday, July 12, 2001

Backposted Pictures

Sometimes I want to compare and contrast a photo taken years ago with a current one ... I'll be posting the older photos here ...

Little Landon - last look back, kindergarten!

This had got to be one of the CLASSIC Blackham family photos! It was at a party for Grayson's work. Doesn't he look AWESOME? This was during little Callahan's "serious" photo face phase, such a happy little boy, but always a mug shot for the camera! This picture backpost is a compare and contrast shot with the same outfit years later on Keaton ... Aloha!


Saturday, February 10, 2001

Stand Up Comedy

I think Bill Cosby was the original comic I ever listened to. I remember putting on a record in my brother's room. Chicken Heart, Labor&Delivery, The Dentist ... so many of his jokes then ended up part of "The Cosby Show" which, thanks to Netflix, the kids are now familiar with.

Other fellows who make us laugh are ...







Brian Reagan: He's probably our favorite comic. Clean enough for the kids too. We caught his act a few years ago when he came to Utah. 



Jim Gaffigan: Gray and I have watched his specials and DVDs and also caught him on tour. He's know for Hot Pockets and Bacon ... I posted his bowling bit on one of my other posts.



Jeff Dunham: This guy is unique in that he uses ventriloquism! He has a number of puppets ... he has a bit of minor language. We say him in concert ... I wasn't too impressed with him there, I think he was drunk!



John Pinette: Most of his jokes have to do with his size (he's a big boy) and food. This little Gluten clip hit home because of Celiac Disease running in our family ...




Mike Birbiglia: We stumbled upon this fellow on Netflix and he made us laughed a lot. (For the more sensitive audiences, he does have a bit of language and inappropriate material, but this clip is clean). 

Wordplay

If you're up for a little lite reading ...
sorry about the different fonts and text sizes,
I'm just cutting and pasting as I go *Ü*

Punny Stuff
Apparently there is an International Pun-Creating contest every year -- and this list represents the top ten first place winners:

1) Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.



2) Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says, "Dam!"



3) Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies "Yes, I'm positive."



4) Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication. 

5) A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?", they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."



6) A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain ; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."



7) Kermit walked into a bank to get a loan. He sat down with Patty Shack and presented all he had to offer for collateral: A doorknob, some old keys and some antique cufflinks. Patty took Kermit’s things to the Bank Manager to see if he would accept them as a down payment. The branch manager took one look at the things and said, “Those are knick-knacks Patty Shack! Give that frog a loan!”



8) A group of friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that only Hugh can prevent florist friars.



9) Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.



10) And finally, there was the person who sent ten different puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.


Words of Wisdom
Washington Post readers were asked to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year’s winners:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus (n.): A person who's both stupid and an ass hole.

3. Intaxication (n.): Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your
money to start with.

4. Reintarnation (n.): Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy (n.): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti (n.): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm (n.): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte (v.): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Osteopornosis (n.): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon (n.): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido (n.): All talk and no action.


Going Places

I have been to a lot of places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone. I've also never been in Cognito, either. I hear no one recognizes you there. I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made several trips, thanks to my friends and family. I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump and I'm not much on physical activity.........


Star Wars Humor

Star Wars Humor
There seems to be a LOT of funny stuff
with a Star Wars theme lately ...


Here's a twist on those motivational posters you see everywhere ...



I almost bought one of these :)



Storm Trooper and Son
Great article with daily photos - check it out!

Star Wars Volkswagon Superbowl Commercial (2011)
Cute Little Darth Vader

Star Wars Recap ...
(I'll need to try and capture some of our own home movies,
of Callahan talking about "wuke", r2D2, and EEIO (C3P0)
... he was a fan a three years old too )



Join the Dark Side ...





Good At-At

Yoda-gami

A good tool for any Star Wars fan

 Politics ... I'd Vote

Conference Call



This video below isn't "funny", but it's pretty incredible
Lego Star Wars Chalk Art ... in 3D







Commercials

If you're going to try and sell me something ... keep me entertained!



Old Spice

... After seeing many Old Spice commercials,
 this picture made me laugh!
It's SO absolutely true!

Below is one of our family favorites ...
I think Landon can quote this word for word.

Other funny commercials ...


WHeat Thins
"Happy Grad" by Chevy

This picture is of "the most interesting man in the world" who runs a series of commercials ...I do think maybe I've seen one or two (I don't watch much live TV) but some of the sayings were pointed out to me and I found myself quite entertained. So, while the spot is for beer, which I'm not going to buy and drink no matter HOW much you make me laugh, I have to say the quotes from these commercials are SO clever!  Here's just a few favorites ...
  • He has won the lifetime achievement award...twice.
  • He is the life of parties he has never attended
  • Bigfoot tries to capture photos of him.
  • Even his enemies list him as their emergency contact.
  • He once taught a German Shepard how to bark in Russian
  • He once had an awkward moment, just to see what it was like.
  • Nothing tastes like chicken to him, not even chicken.
  • At museums he's allowed to touch the art.
  • His personality is so magnetic, he is unable to carry credit cards.
  • He once challenged his own reflection to a staring contest. On the fourth day, he won.
  • His mother has a tattoo that reads "Son". 
  • When in Rome they do as he does.
  • He once visited The Virgin Islands... they are now called The Islands.
  • He was once pulled over for speeding, but he let the officer go with just a warning.
  • His charm is so contagious, vaccines we're created for it.
  • Sharks have a week dedicated to him.
  • He's won trophies for his game face alone.
  • Police often question him, just because they find him interesting. 



Other things that make me laugh ...
LaughLinks

Kid History


Kid History


A newspaper article about it ...



Episode 1: An Introduction 
Episode 2: Adventures of Randy, John and Kyle
Episode 3: A trip to Chile
Episode 4: Polly Pocket and the Globetrotters ... FACT! **
Episode 5: Going to Camp **
Episode 6: Nutritious Food and Candy
Episode 7: A Christmas Episode (Big Trac!) **


** Blackham Favorites!
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